Write Right Now

Cliche, But It's The Start To A Great Finish

2012-01-01T09:08:00.000-08:00

January 1, 2012.

"It's the first day of the new year. New me." Yeah.... well I still like the "old" me.

"This will be the year. This is the one. It's gonna be different." I've totally said this before. Probably more than once or twice.

"Day one of my weight loss challenge!" Ok. Statistics show it works for the first 30 days. Gyms are packed at ALL hours of the day. But it starts dying out late January, and gradually continues for 3-4 more months later.

No doubt those are all common phrases we've heard or even have said ourselves when the new year rolls around. Maybe even some of us have actually stuck to a "resolution" made at the beginning of the new year.

Yet, I have found if you set a realistic, short-term goal, you're more than likely to achieve it. Especially if it's written out, you can visually see what you're trying to achieve and remind yourself that there's something there that needs to get done. Set goals, don't make resolutions. Goals are more realistic.

Mine?
Get back in school.
New car in 6 months.
Move out in a year.

On the other hand, why must it be a "new year" to make changes to our lifestyles?

I'm not worried about the world ending in 2012. It will end itself when it's good and ready and no one will know. We should live every day like it's our last. There might be a day where it is our last. Regardless about your take on religion, your beliefs, lets live our lives like every day is a blessing. Every day is a gift.

2011. You were decent to me for the most part. I lost my grandfather, a man I cherished and loved so much, in a way I never would have imagined. I took some risks. I made some mistakes. I became more patient and positive. I learned to let love in. I let go of the negative relationships, made extraordinary new ones, and rekindled cherished old ones.

My wish for 2012?

Let's love like crazy, take lots of pictures, laugh more, have little moments, big moments, spend more time with our family, our friends. Say, "I love you" like you mean it, whenever you mean it. And just maybe, somewhere in all of this, the greatness we have sought our whole lives will emerge, and our light will shine to the world. Positive thoughts create positive energy, so it's time to be positive. The time is now. It always has been.

Temptation

2011-07-31T21:33:00.001-07:00

Temptation/If there was a picture/It’d be yours painted next to the definition/I’m a painter/Creating and using my own foundation/I paint pictures for later/For the haters/Because without them who would truly care?/Look/Don’t judge me for what I wear/How I do my hair/You know nothing, get outta here/I’m more of a man/Than some dudes that have a ehmm in their pants/I’m lethal with a pen in hand/Romantic when I’m holdin’ hands/Sometimes I think I can/Than reality sets in/And really all we can ever do is kick it/No kissin’/Not even touchin’/Only lust, no lovin’/Yeah I don’t know what I’m missin’/And leading you on isn’t my intention/Somethin’ so complex it feels like a mission/Submission/WWE/The way you are/It’s somethin’ oh so sweet/tea/It’s killin’ me softly/Kisses on my cheek sendin’ through volts of electricity/Finally/Someone who gets my personality/Who’s not rushin’ me/goin’ with the flow like the Mississippi/Not with overflow/Slow goin’/Paddle boat/Just so you know/I’ve clarified/Invested the time tellin’/I’m not sure what’s on my mind but I’m tryin’/Maybe the effort isn’t as concerted as you’d like it/But I’m tryin’/For once I’m not denyin’/Maybe I’m just buyin’ time/Yeah right/Isn’t that somethin’ we’d all like to try?/ Lies/ They’re easier to tell than the truth/From day one I promised you/Honesty/ And honestly, I’ve been doin’ pretty good/So it seems/ But beauty/ Is in the eye of the beholder and everything/ So I’ll just keep painting/ You just keep standing/ Still/ If you will/ No sudden movements/ You might just send me to the moon/ When you walk into the room/ Who am I kiddin’/ You do/I keep tryin' to resist/ And that’s why you’re temptation

6.24.2011

2011-06-24T22:31:00.000-07:00

Rolled up a blunt
yeah I know that's a bit blunt
maybe even a bit dunce
but just once
I'd like you all to see
the places that aren't meant to be seen
that inner me
have you questioning my authority
respectfully
I'm not asking you to get on your knees
I'm asking you to pay attention to me
It's easier to have ya eyes instead of ya ears
but when you've been gone 3 years
dodging the leers of the haters is ridiculous
Yeah
it's not exactly my kind of poetry
but I'll take what I can get since it's me
I'm still me
a wise sage indeed
twenty-four, and I'm knockin' on everyone's door
I just need some support
Like I'm in rehab and you're my consultant
It's gorgeous
Like when you throw on a record
A new CD
Pick out every lyric
Imagining the paper scribbled on with a pen
Maybe it's just me
Maybe that's just what I see
Yeah, I feel the beats,
but it's the words that get me.

[[ Insert Title Here ]]

2011-05-12T09:15:00.000-07:00

I've kind of been doing this self evaluation thing lately. Some of it's because I've been goin' to church, some of it is the fact that I'm about to be 24 and haven't done ANY of the things I said I was going to.

What happened to me?

I was supposed to write this big time novel.
I was supposed to publish a few poems.
I was supposed to be a teacher.
I was supposed to be stable; a working car, a place to call my own.

Then I think...
High school ended.
I come up with excuses.
Joey died...

Now I think, why did that have to stop me? How it's just an excuse.
Truth be told.. It hurt when he left.
And it still does.

Sure, I'm in college, have my AA, about a year and a half out of my B.A. But at 22/23 I should have been done. I should be in a classroom doing what I feel I'm supposed to do. And what's my excuse?

If anything, I've learned about the "we're not promised tomorrow" because of it. But learning something, and applying something are two different things.

I think it's time.

Time to stop with all the excuses and do everything I aspire to be. I have SO many ambitions!
Time to stop with all the negativity. I LOVE the positive energy I feel when I feel it! There's not so much weight on my shoulders; I can breathe!

It's time to be optimistic. To look at our glasses as MORE than just half full!

We're not given tomorrow.

Let's seize today!

If tomorrow never comes...

2011-05-01T20:26:00.000-07:00

If tomorrow never comes,
cry only for a little while
for there are many memories to hold on to

If tomorrow never comes,
cherish my love for music
as well as my love for poetry

If tomorrow never comes,
be not ashamed of the secrets to be revealed
for they are now all that is left

If tomorrow never comes,
I'm sorry, I tried
but I just haven't tried hard enough

If tomorrow never comes,
I've made many mistakes
but they have defined me

If tomorrow never comes,
remember my dreams and aspirations
cry because of my lack of motivation

If tomorrow never comes,
realize, that I realized
I didn't act soon enough with my gift

If tomorrow never comes,
promise me some things;
     promise me that you'll never go to bed mad
          that you'll send a simple text message just to say you're sorry
     promise me that you'll be forgiving
          and remember, I tried my hardest at that too
     promise me you'll say "I love you" to those you truly do
          and don't forget to love on your animals too
     promise me you'll do something for the kids'
          they're the hope we must hold on to
     promise me that you'll stand up for what is right
          a little rebellion is needed for success
     promise me that you'll be giving
          and that you'll do onto other what should be done onto you

If tomorrow never comes
let it be known that everyone who I ever met
we shared an experience
and whatever experience that might have been
Thank you

Because if tomorrow never comes
you all must be told how important you are
how you matter
and how precious life truly is
A gift

Let's color!

2011-04-20T21:14:00.000-07:00

Growing up, (and I know this because I work in child care) we teach our kids to color inside the lines. We don’t care too much about the color because it’s their imagination they’re running with, but we just care about staying in the lines.
But as we get older, we stick to that fundamental coloring in the lines for everything. So then it’s a rule; a command we’ve grown accustomed to. Everything we do in life is about staying within those lines; that comfort zone we were taught as kids.

So how do we blossom? How do we shine? We have to step out of those lines and show the world what we’ve been given. Sure, you’re scared, I’m scared, we’re all scared. If we don’t take any chances where are we gonna end up? Surely not at the top.

Life. It’s messy. It’s colorful. It is ever-changing. If we don’t color outside the lines, how will we know what’s out there for us? Give me a box of crayons, some paint, pencils, markers, pens, give me something that will help me make my mark on the world.

My Beekeepers..

2011-04-15T15:31:00.000-07:00

If you can't accept me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. True statement. I went to visit Joey today and I was thinkin' about all those that knew me during that time and have stayed by me, as well as those who had just barely met me and stayed by me. It really was a low point in my life, and as I look back at it, I find myself remembering all those who stayed; who kept me. I realize how truly blessed I am with some of my friends; you know who you are. You remember who I was back then and who I am now. I can only continue to grow along with you if you continue to keep me. This honey thrives off of you.

Mirror

2011-04-04T21:51:00.000-07:00

Often times, I find myself looking in the mirror, lost in some thought, some day dream. I mean, looks are not exactly in my favor, but that's not why I look.

Sometimes, my eyes are red and puffy from crying; from holding everything in. Sometimes there are dark circles under my eyes because of the insomnia that frequents my evenings. Sometimes, my eyes are the most beautiful color for no reason at all. I have this line on my forehead; drives me nuts. I used to hate my thick, long, curly hair, but now, I'm learning to manage it. I'm not girly, but I'm workin' on it. I'm tryin' to read more. I'm tryin' to write more.

Yet sometimes I look at myself and I see this truly pathetic piece of work. Inadequate. A girl holding in so much and yet, tells the world to talk about their problems when she doesn't even know where to begin herself. Someone who is trying to carry weight, but hides the bumps and bruises she gets from doing so.

I start a lot of dreams. And I do mean A LOT.

I'd like to think I'm blessed with the talent of writing, especially when I have a chance to get a thought in order. So I've tried writing several books........ Do you see any published yet? I always find something wrong; I'm my harshest critic. Why am I going to try to put something out there to help someone, to help the world, when it just doesn't feel right? Fact or fiction? Why should it matter? Because at the end of the day, what should matter, is that it mattered to someone. That something I wrote, that came from MY head, my heart that it all would somehow matter. My poetry? Gosh... I can't even begin to tell you where that's gone. It's def. not the same it was 4 years ago. Not to mention, I find ANYTHING I produce inadequate; yet I'm too scared to share. And handing something off to my friends doesn't exactly benefit because they're supposed to say it's good when really, they should be telling me what's wrong, what I can change. If it's fine, well then genuinely tell me.

School? The thought of NOT finishing, terrifies me. It's not for everyone else, it's for me, because in the long run, it's about the kids. I've learned that a college degree can take time; but I need to stop wasting it.

I'm def. scared of what people think; I've never fully admitted it, but there it is. Because all my life has been has been about pleasing someone and not doing something for me; for MY life.

In one of my blogs, I said I was going to get some writing out there. Well... four months into 2011, I have yet to try. TRY. That's all I can ask of myself. Because if I don't try, I'll never know.

I think in our lives there is always someone else we're trying to please instead of stepping out and being ourselves. I know that's my issue.

Joey died. He's gone. I have to learn something from that even with as much as I wish I could take it back. Wish I would have went instead of being "too tired" to save my best friend... to save my brother. It's not something we can simply just "get over" but it's def. something we can learn from. Moreso than knowing I'm not promised tomorrow, and any other time after. Life is truly a gift. What are we doing with it and who are we doing it for?

Simple Farewell

2011-03-31T22:36:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I barely knew the kid,

but most that sit before you can testify his greatness

can testify that he was taken, far too soon,

can testify that here we sit with open wounds

with open minds

about this not so much of a game called life

But what catches my attention, my eye,

I just can’t bear to see this friend of mine cry

Makes me wanna hold her, tell her it will all be alright

Tell her she’s not alone, don’t give up the fight

That it doesn’t get easier, you just learn

how to get through this pain and hurt,

to hold on to the hope of seeing him again someday

because really, we wouldn't have it any other way

I’ll agree, a free spirit is JP

But he’s here, if kept close to your heart, he’s always in it

He’s just a memory away, but he’s here, he’s with ya everyday

Speakin’ of days, I remember when I first met him,

Just days after Joey’s death and I was still feelin’ messed up and grim,

It was Jon Paul’s smile, his grin, won my heart instantly

Now I’m not sayin’ we kicked it everyday, but we weren’t enemies

Once or twice more, maybe, that’s it, but it was never the same,

His presence was radiating

It’s a shame,

the world really did lose someone great that day

Someone with dreams, with aspirations,

Now, he’s off to a different destination

Farewell JP, you are already missed,

Farewell JP, everyone’s gracious friend

A Beautiful Mind 02.05.2011

2011-02-05T10:05:00.000-08:00

I spent majority of my morning enjoying my porch and the weather outside! It has been below freezing all week in New Mexico! To top it off, we suffered a gas shortage. But back to why I was outside. I'm just sitting there jamming out and I get to thinking about thinking..

-About making a list to give a few thoughts.
-About what I'm wearing for the day
-My choice of music; rap is the frequent genre but there are many others. I'm always open to music.
-About walking to the park by my work, running around it during my break, then go back. All sweaty but who am I impressing?
-Pastor Steve and the letter I want to write to him.. that thought makes me laugh
-About friendship and how I'm not exactly the good friend people say I am
-About how I can do better in that aspect
-These crazy dreams about being a rapper
-About Gangsta Chris
-How Facebook has become this networking site for public conversation as opposed to picking up the phone or texting for such an intimate conversation.
-How a blog like this works because anyone can do exactly what I'm doing; documenting a thought.. or in my case, thoughts
-How does NM have a gas shortage when we're one of the largest suppliers of natural gas?
-About the way my "poetry" is now; it's almost like I've forgotten how to do it any way else when in reality there are hundreds of ways to document a thought
-About how I say I'm gonna write that best-selling novel and I haven't sat down to document a single thought even though I've had hundreds.
-About how I tweet a lot because there's a way to document a thought right away
-About the three books I've started reading but have slowly declined in
-About how I need to get ready

For the Soldiers...

2011-01-27T15:59:00.000-08:00

As I sit here, thinking about soldiers, I'm safely secure inside my home, watching T.V, and dressed comfortably. If I want to eat, I just get up and walk to the kitchen and choose from a variety of options; hot, cold, healthy, junky. I have many liberties.

Yet, thousands of miles away, across an ocean, in countries dominated my terrorism and different forms of government, sit Americans, with orders that we can only imagine. At the same time, we can only imagine what they are going through. Roadside bombs, not knowing if that really is an innocent child, bullets whizzing by; some of the few things that go on. We forget about psychological impacts. PTSD does exist, and in the case of our soldiers, ignorance is not bliss.

Soldiers are fighting the frontlines of our freedom. WE CAN NOT FORGET THEM! Soldiers die everyday FOR US and I think it's time we do something FOR THEM.

To all the soldiers, to my friends who serve, to all who serve, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Keep your head low and your spirits high.

2010

2010-12-31T22:48:00.000-08:00

As I sit here in the final minutes of 2010, I find it a bit cliche that I am reflecting on the year. Yet, I am almost certain that there are MILLIONS of other people who are or have done the same. I must say, 2010 defined my year as an adult.

I went from just going to school and smoking and working, to doing all those things but actually having a social life. Granted, it wasn't much of one, but I went out more often, had beers on more than one occasion just because, and engaged in older adult interaction (whereas now it's legit to be 23 and talk intelligently with a 50 year old).

I also started at UNM, and if their education program didn't suck so bad, I'd stay there. Granted, it's all she said, he said b/s from NMHU but I know many transfers from UNM so I don't doubt it. But so far, English is legit.

I also moved out, failed, moved back home, and I gotta say, so far so good. But I do realize my failure is due to my actions, but hey, I'm sure we've all done that once too.

Fall of 2010 brought forth a new, shall we say, discovery. Many claim to have known all along, but I finally realized it. It's not to it's full potential that everyone always thought it was, but it's there; a thought that I shall freely admit when brought up in a conversation the third-party initiates. But, seeing how I am just in the testing phase, there is no need to express my non-sexual hypothesis.

And, FINALLY, after 3 years of being in the dark, my writing has woken up and taken a different road. I am fine with it. I am just happy to be writing again! My lonliness now has company!

With that, I conclude 2010. AM I GLAD YOU'RE GONE!

I welcome 2011 with open arms, and open mind, and I really do plan on making a difference this year and getting some of my writing out there.

CHEERS TO ALL IN 2011.. Let's really make it a year!

On gifts..

2010-12-13T14:59:00.000-08:00

A co-worker and I were talking about giving gifts today. She's only getting gifts for certain people. I, on the other hand, am giving all 35 employees gifts; chapstick, socks, lotion, and banana bread. I think of it this way: Sure, there are select people I would just wanna give gifts, but the others, the ones I don't select, are bound to get me something. It's because everyone at my job likes me, give or take a few, but still. So I think, what if I don't get one of those someones a gift? So instead of leaving anyone out, everyone gets the same thing. Granted, there are select individuals who get a lil something extra but that's really it.

Isn't it about giving anyways? Religion aside.

Word

2010-12-04T19:50:00.000-08:00

Been doin' a lot of thinkin' yeah, my mind is real crazy, and, lately

I don't feel like myself, a shell, a casing, it's hell

has me pacing halls covered in paste with padded walls

and they might as well restrain me, it's plainly, in writing

it's vague but it's from my mind, comes at any time.

See, you don't believe me when I say I need help, you think I'm fine

I just wanna yell, hell, just gimme a pill

Imma deal with it, take four, shut the door, heal, and deal with it

it might take a couple of minutes, maybe hours, days, weeks, or even years

we all saw what happened, but I made it, I'm still here

I've gained back your eyes, maybe one day I'll have ya ears.

No lie, truth all around

I'm not gonna deny my schizophrenic mind, it's beautiful

full of hope, dope, yeah I quit the coke

nope, maybe not cold turkey, but it's no longer a tease for me

guess I just tamed my addictive personality, crawled into the lap of reality

waking up, shaking it up like Elvis Presley.

Metaphors and similies are becoming a hobby, a specialty

lobby, reform, just don't conform, be yourself

yeah it's hard but don't make it about wealth and be stealth

in your navigation cuz with a mind like mind, no tellin' the destination

ya don't need a high class education to understand my presentation I have a PhD in augmentation

of the mind, make ya think with a rhyme, it may take sometime

but soon, you'll realize that the truth is better than a lie

even though the truth is easier to hide.

I'm worth the ride, the trip, I'm addictive like the drip

sweet or sour, depends on the hour and Imma stop being a coward

gonna get to ya by using my words, word, that's my favorite word

it can mean any word, and I'll continue to use it forever

Word...

Introduction

2010-11-26T19:50:00.000-08:00

Tic, tac, toe, here I go, about to introduce myself in a flow,

the name’s K, or Kristin, just shut up and listen, I guess you can say,

I’m tired of runnin’, tired of hidin’, so I’m back and I’m rhymin’

with rhymes so sick, it’s practically poetic, there’s no denyin’ it, quick,

who said I needed to sell drugs to kick it? Yeah I’ve done played the game but quit it cold turkey,

yeah the money is fine but the time ain’t worth it.

Who said I was over and done with this shit?

I’m just changin’ up the game, in search of the fame, I ain’t playin’,

games are my specialty, because in my world, it’s mind over body,

skip the looks and judge my personality, I’mma technicality, thinkin’ logically,

gonna teach ya a little somethin’ about morality, I’m comin’ clean,

yeah I smoke the green, would ya rather see me insane, goin’ crazy?

I’m makin’ my own rules, never know I used to sell drugs with my grades in school.

That’s the first rule; go to school, don’t be a downright fool. Skip to number two;

watch ya back, trust no woman, trust no man, the only trust ya have is in ya hands.

Just remember the fans, that’s rule three, cuz without em, you wouldn’t be you and I wouldn’t be me

cuz it gives me someone to write to when I’m lonely,

when I’m feelin’ low, even when I’m flyin’ high,

yeah that’s right, I’m spittin’ game in a rhyme. Rule four says that’s fine

so long as I draw the line, and leave out names til they drop mine.

Rule five is tell less lies, keep it real, keep it right, cuz there’s only one chance at this thing called life,

Rule six says stash ya tricks, keep em in a bag til you're ready to bang

and rule seven says ya better make it to some kind of heaven,

whether it be God driven or just tryin’ to meet an old friend.

Rule eight is the promise made to become MADE, whether it’s years, months, or days.

Rule nine says there’s no time to get it right so long as you’re not givin’ up the fight,

cut the lights, hop on this flight because rule ten is to tell everyone I’m back again

and I’m sorry I ran and I owe it to ya man, woman, husbands, wives, even the children.

Check out the intensity, do ya feel it as ya step closer to me? This electricity,

it’s kind of frightening, perfect timing, I was getting bored of this life thing,

so I’m sitting here writing, just trying, to tell a story,

time to shine and claim my glory

cuz it’s mine for the taking, a beautiful mind in the making, just wait and see,

yeah I know it’s different, but it’s the new me, I’ll take what I can get,

gonna have so many number one hits, pay close attention right quick,

been gone three years, best believe I’m ready to spill it,

like oil, I’m royal, and I’m loyal, no time to toil, to fuss,

to cause a ruckus on things that don’t make sense to all of us. Love or lust?

I don’t see what’s the fuss, playa hatin’ ain’t a must, please trust,

I’m goin’ deeper than the Earth’s crust, to the core, I can’t be stuck in that world anymore,

I’ve opened the door, step right in, wipe your feet on the mat, then come right in, take a seat,

soon, I’ll begin…

Flow for Joe

2010-11-18T21:47:00.000-08:00

I cant help it, ya know, cuz when the words come, they flow, no tellin’ where Imma go I’ve been gone three years cuz I couldn’t find the word, cuz I was hurt, what do ya expect, I was forced to put you under dirt, and I’m not gon’ lie, all I did was cry and deny the truth. Why? Why you? Why not me?You were always stronger than I’ll ever be and I wanna leave but I can’t so instead I’ll just kick it, smoke some weed, pop some pills, it’s the only way I can chill, mellow out, cuz without, I’ll go crazy without a doubt. I wish I could go back to that night, back in time, yeah, when I was fourteen and outta line with a gun to my head, Russian roulette style, but it was the fourth click instead. Click, click, click, so I popped open that shit, yup, fourth bullet, fuck it, I’m better than this, gotta rise above all of it. Quick, grab me a pen, let’s begin with a trip to a fateful Sunday night when I dipped from work, we were spose to kick it right, sit back and do some blow that night. I called you up instead, “Na brother, I’m not gonna go, but call me tomorrow, I got that dro. Don’t forget I love you bro.” “Damn K, gonna miss ya face, but I’ll see ya tomorrow, and I love you ok.” Then a phone click. Tomorrow came, and you didn’t. And to this day, I can’t believe it, it feels fake, see, but it can’t be, I remember that fresh fade you must’ve gotten that day, see, and I laid eyes on a black casket with white satin, praying hands to match ya chest, only for the best in the West. Dressed so fresh wearing blue jeans and a black tall tee, white sneaks. Joe, I remember fallin’ to my knees when I saw your lifeless body, ran outside, it was straight sunny, but with you shining down, the rain fell and meshed in wit my face, then came the pain and even through all the pills and cocaine, couldn’t get numb enough to strip it away, to overdose, just a numb nose. Without a doubt, you had a packed house, a person like you, well-known. When I read what I wrote, every word quivered, every word showed just how much you meant to me Joe. I never really appreciated mother nature then, not until the day we buried ya, cuz when they covered ya with dirt, I fell to Mother Earth with pain, written plain as day across my face and after that I visited you practically every day, anyway, I caught myself slippin’, talkin’ to you even though you weren’t livin’. You gave me signs, no lies, the wind blew and the blunt smoke scattered, and my tears pitter-pattered on your headstone, blown, with blow in the cracks and I finally realized, I finally snapped, you’re not coming back, whereas years ago it should’ve been me, you passing on must have some truth in that. Lay out the facts. I’d give anything to have your life back. I’m tryin’ to wake up Joe, tryin’ to make a promise, to grow from the mistakes we mad as young guns and sometimes I give in to temptation, yeah, she’s a wild bitch, but it gets easier to ignore the itch, to reject the teaser, it’s easier to say no today then it was in past years, not gon’ cave. I know you’re just a prayer away, and I know I’ll see you again someday, at the crossroads, yeah I know it’ll happen when the time is right, and until then, I’ll keep the promise I made to not give up the fight.

Quickie

2010-11-13T00:21:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I can't carry a tune, but I can write one, somethin' so good, it make ya eyes pop, can't stop, I've got, time to burn another one, ain't that somethin' hun? Lotta fun, gotta run, into my own little world, you bring some boys, I'll bring some girls, real talk, I'm the spot, make it hot, think ya better? I think not. Even when I'm sick, I'm so ill, once again I'm real, haters is fakers, but I'm the maker, my own creator, dictator, Mr. Richter scale says Imma ten, well, guess I win, quick, go buy me a five dolla pen, and some paper, green or white, it don't matter, I'll just keep on climbin' this ladder, to the top, even then I won't stop, caught, I think not, cuz my mind is on rewind and I can't stop time, slow it down, claim my crown, throw up the A and rep my town

Quick tip...

2010-11-09T21:48:00.001-08:00

There's no point in hiding what we, and everyone else, already know. It's discovering who we are that is difficult. Who's to say you're something you're not? Who's to say you can't do something you know you can? You are the master of your own fate, the captain of your own soul... dream on my friends ♥ Kristin

Life Lesson.. Ok.. It's common sense

2010-11-08T21:30:00.001-08:00

So I get out of class tonight, skate to my car in the darkness I totally spaced about. I park in a parking lot off of Yale; $2.50, but I can stay at the library all I want...

ANYWAYS...

I hop off my board and there is this car next to me; someone had left their car keys on the trunk of their car. So I figured, put them on the windshield wipers. I loaded up my car, then thought better of it. I wrote, "You left your keys on the trunk of your car so I hid them in a place where all our money goes. Sorry for the obvious riddle, but I don't want anyone to still your car. Call me and ask for Kristin" and I left my number.
About 9:30 tonight, I get this phone call. It's this lady thanking me for finding her keys. Apparently, she was all messed up after a dental surgery today and couldn't believe she lost her keys. She said I was a "blessing, an angel" and that "good karma is coming" my way.

Do to others what you would want done to you. It's a life lesson. One perhaps that has change my outlook on life for the better. It's a form of eutopia, and if we ALL did it, imagine how easy it would be to achieve....

Addicted

2010-10-18T21:29:00.000-07:00

I must be some sort of masochist for you, yes it's true, here's a clue, my eyes are smilin'

when I look at you, and ya got me goin' crazy too, just what do you expect me to do?

It's just a feelin' I can't ignore, you walk into the room, my heart drops to the floor,

really, I don't mean to implore, or introduce, but ya walkin' into an open door,

an open book, quick, look, crook, you stole it,

yea, my heart, right out from under my nose, my knows, and I can't ask for it back

because in your hands it feels like home, not alone, or cold as ice

quick, grab some ice, for this bruis that's black and blue

that has me sufferin' when you're touchin' it, gets me hustlin', on my grind,

and you're that desirable paper, gotta get mine.

I've tried to escape it but ya can't run from fate, see,

I have no idea what I'm doin', it's useless, I'm losin',

you're winnin', have my head spinnin'

You see, everytime I see your face, or hear ya voice, it's by choice, that

I succummb to a place where my heart can't keep it's pace, it's a race

and I just keep on chasin' my tail, my personal hell, it jail, imprisoned,

in this life I find myself livin'

goin' in circles, it's a whirl---wind in a world, untamed, unnamed

not built for this pleasureful pain, or any amount of money, any amount of fame

So here, take this crayon, borrow some paint, just go color someone else's town,

someone else's world, just paint someone else's sky

just keep fakin' the truth and maskin' it with a lie

You don't mind setting me on fire, but ya can't stand to watch me burn,

I'd call ya a liar, but I can't stand to see ya hurt

or watch ya cry, see ya frown, watch ya soul leave ya eyes

Cuz when you're around, my heart begins to flutter,

it's them butterflies, and then ya smille and I stutter, stammer,

hit in the head with a hammer, then I can't utter

the words that say you're on my mind all the time, all day

Really, what can I say, you have my heart on stand-by, please standby, stand still

I'm addicted, you're my kind of pill, no lyin', no joke, I'm bein' real, I'll take another dose

Quit bracin' yourself for another lie, here's a hint, it ain't comin', so just relax your mind

Just let it breathe, give in to me, cuz ya got me speakin' the truth

poppin' off honesty without the booth

Don't ya know I can't lie to you? that I'm speakin' the truth when I'm speakin' to you?

It's no blunder, no wonder, no mistake, open ya eyes, I promise you're awake

just quit bein' fake, quit playin' games, it's a shame, you can't expect me to lose this race

I'll take a risk, be this masochist, I'll take your pain, I'll just pop some pills to take it away

then I'll wake up tomorrow and do it over again, I can't help it

I'm Addicted